Another Day, some more Drama

So, I have been trying my best, lord knows. But I think there is really a point where I have to put a stop to it. You know, seems the farther I stay away from drama the more it surrounds me. I feel like getting up and running, running as far away as possible, and that with doing all that all this will just go away and things will get back to normal. UGH, what should I do?????

Lost in my dreams

So I have been having a whole mixture of dreams, and to be honest, I really wonder what it all means sometimes. Lately, maybe it's because I really miss my GZ but, I have been dreaming that he has come home but before all that we had to go through a very lengthy process. I guess I'm having these kind of dreams because I feel that this is what it is going to take. I just wish it would hurry up and happen. It has been almost going on two years. Since then I have had to deal with all the DRAMA that has gone on. Sometimes I get frustrated and feel as if I want out but in the long run I know that he is the one I want to be with and feel that we will sometime soon be together again. Is this me being naive? Or is this what they call wishful thinking? Who knows, I just can never imagine myself with anyone else. Tell you something else, I can't see anyone else playing the "daddy" role for my kids. I would never be able to get used to that idea. Funny how I thought I had my life all planned out for me and in a split of a second it came tumbling down. Also, sometimes I just don't understand certain family members of his. I just don't understand how they can really claim to care for him but yet feed him a lot of BS that drives him nuts! Funny thing is he is someone dumb enough to believe it. I guess! But even so, I still continue to do what I shall and be by his side. I hope it's not all in vain! I hope one day he realizes exactly what we have. You know I have run into people I went to school with(Middle School) and they all get really shocked to know that we are still together. Funny how things work out, fate?